As a leader, you know your team. You see them succeed and help to celebrate triumphs. But, sometimes, you can see that a team member is struggling. Not just a bad day or an off week, but an evident struggle. You may notice missed deadlines or a decline in work quality. Sometimes you may see tardiness or a reduction in overall attentiveness. As a leader, this can make you feel frustrated and helpless. And it can also harm your business.

When everyone sits together in an office, it’s often easier to know what’s happening with team members, making it easier to offer support. But, when your team is virtual, it can be challenging to know what’s up beyond feeling that the person is struggling.

Sometimes, employees face personal issues ranging from health concerns to family issues. In some cases, childcare issues or fraying personal relationships make it difficult for employees to concentrate. And, sometimes, your team member may be thinking of moving on to another job.

As a leader of a virtual team, there are tips and tricks you can use to help offer support to employees who are struggling, so you can steer your team members back to the right path, or in some circumstances, help her find the right off-ramp.

Here are our best tips to help support an employee who appears to be struggling.

Listen

The first step is to talk with the employee. Don’t assume you know the nature of the issue.

Set up a time to talk. Make sure the time you set aside is free of other distractions and is not bound tightly by meetings or other obligations at the start or end.

Begin your talk with a friendly chat. After a few minutes of pleasantries, ask how she is and how things are going. Don’t say that you are worried about her or that you sense a struggle. Just tee up the conversation with a casual chat and some general questions. Then, listen in a non-judgemental way.

You may be surprised by what you learn. The employee may provide important clues about the struggle you sense. For example, the employee may share that her kids have been home from school due to quarantine or that she’s had to take on care of an older relative. You may also hear that she’s struggling to learn a new skill that she needs for the job or that she’s wrestling with a work capacity issue.

Whatever you hear, avoid offering solutions right out of the gate. Instead, reflect on what you’ve heard and show empathy.

If you don’t hear anything that could cause the struggle, it’s OK to say something like, ‘You don’t seem like yourself lately, and I’ve been a little worried about you, so I wanted to have this check-in.’ This could open up a new line of conversation.

Some people are super private and will choose not to share concerns openly. That’s ok, too. But still, listen for clues as you can.

Consider options

Once you know more about the issue, consider if it’s something you can help resolve or if there are ways to alleviate the issue leading to the struggle. 

If you learn that the struggle is rooted in family care or other time-based issues, consider:

• Offering time off or a short leave of absence.
• Looking at ways to make the work day more flexible.
• Asking if scaling hours up or down could help.
• Looking into online or phone-based mental health resources that could help.

If the issue appears to be skills-based, consider:

• Spending extra time with the employee to offer hands-on support.
• Providing a training program.
• Getting a coach to help.
• Assigning a more seasoned employee as a mentor.

In some cases, the issue could be thornier. For example, the employee may be thinking of changing careers or looking for a different type of job. In this case, consider if you want to retain the employees and what it might take to do so. Sharpen the pencil and see if you can offer more compensation or other benefits to keep the employee. 

You may consider if another role on your team might be a better fit for the employee and explore if a role change could solve the problem.

In some cases, your conversation may make it clear that it may be better for you and the employee to part ways. The prospect of losing a valued employee can prompt feelings of sadness or anxiety about finding a replacement, But, don’t take this development personally.

People leave jobs for as many different reasons as there are jobs. As an employer, some of the transitions are expected and outside of your control. For example, an employee who finishes a degree may decide to move on to a job in her field of study. Sometimes people have new family obligations–or family commitments change–and they choose to scale back or increase work obligations. Likewise, sometimes interests just change or curiosity drives people to try new things. 

In these cases, there’s not much you can do as an employer. But, there are things you can do to smooth the transition by helping the employee find a mutually agreeable off-ramp, thank the employee for her service and end the relationship positively. Doing so means you are poised to continue a good relationship with that person. In some cases, the employee may return to you later or suggest a friend as a resource.

Circle back

Once you’ve had a chance to think about options and how to support the employee, set up some time to talk again. In some cases, you may want to send an email in advance that says you’ve been thinking about ways to support her based on your last conversation and that you’d  like a chance to discuss. You can even preview some of your ideas in the note.

When the call starts, begin with a check-in to see how things are going. Then, offer that you have been thinking about the situation and outline the support you have in mind. 

Give the employee a chance to consider them and offer a follow-up call to discuss more fully, if needed.

Step Back

As an employer, you can’t solve everyone’s problems. But, it is in your best interest to help make sure that each employee can offer her best each day by removing obstacles that can make it difficult.

Tell us about a time you helped an employee through a difficult time or what recommendations you have.